This year it's a little different. Not only am I late in posting this up (was working at Starhub), I will be talking about a concept, which basically summed up my year.
It's called the Chaos Theory.
The Chaos Theory is an area of inquiry in physics, mathematics and philosophy, studying the behaviour of dynamic systems that are highly sensitive to initial conditions.
Basically, this means that small differences in initial conditions of a situation can cause huge differences in outcomes, making long term prediction impossible in general.
For example, you can put a small ball on the top of the hill, but which direction it rolls towards is determined by hundreds of small, individual factors.
This theory is encapsulated in the popularly known metaphor, the Butterfly Effect, which I also mentioned sometime ago in the past.
In 2008, I enlisted into the army. I could have gone into Tekong in April with most of my friends, yet instead I enlisted in early January.
I could have completed my BMT, became an officer, seargent or medic, but I became a driver, much to everyone's surprise.
Many months later, my immediate seniors in my unit were about to ORD. A group of them briefly considered to extend their service term, which also meant that I would never have been an ambulance driver, but I did.
In June 2009, orders from HQ came and between two ambulance drivers, one had to selected as a NDP driver. There was a huge debate and discussion, and my buddy was briefly considered, but in the end I got the nod.
In October, I planned my last duties and my leave. I almost had to do one more week of duty, but last minute training of my replacement meant that I was free from 26th onwards.
Instead of having duty, I went home that day. I wanted to play basketball with Sinkiat late that day, but he had other plans, so I decided to pay you a visit, because you had a bad day.
Those are seemingly random events, which could have easily gone any other way. But little did I know, they all added up and pointed to a direction, and that was to you.
I spent my last 5 minutes of the New Year, in revelation and amusement of this fact.
It seems amazing to me. It's like the universe in a huge machine, and these events are small intricate parts of the machine, all working constantly to make sure you end up where you're supposed to be, doing what you're supposed to do.
Some people call it fate, some people call it destiny, some people call it God's will, and personally I just think of it as a script that we are meant to follow, to go through the motions, like tiny cogs and gears pushing the hands of a clock along.
I realise I often make the mistake of counting down too much. Counting down to the next book out, counting down to university life, counting down the end of my tiring shifts at work, counting down to the next time I see my family and friends.
But perhaps instead of counting down to the future, or thinking about the past, I should concentrate on the present instead.
There are so many things and so many people, constantly interacting, brushing past and intertwining, that it almost seems like a waste that I haven't been paying enough attention to them.
So my New Year Resolution will be a simple one, and that is to be more appreciative to things happen around me, complain less and to live in the moment.
I want to thank everyone, my family, my friends and my relatives who were there for me. I can't list your names and contributions individually, because I want to do justice to your influence and to the things you have did to prod me along.
And as always, one small exception to you girl. =)
Wishing everyone a happy 2010!
Best wishes from the owner of aquietcoffee.blogspot.com,
Xiujie
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